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Literature by halcyonshores

texte by BloodyDragon22

Writing by musicXofaXdeadXopera


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Submitted on
March 20, 2012
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There's a band aid on her ankle
bleeding up her thigh and onto her neck.
A right handed whiskey bottle slung
over her razor wire shoulder .
Today, the train track was a catwalk .

Nothing about her  hair or her lip ring
cried out "Help me".  No, she was the
collective pulse and the sun couldn't set
until she took off those shades.
…I couldn't leave until I found her eyes.

She shouted over the whistle of an approaching train.

"Sometimes you can find lumps of coal tucked between the rails.
They turn into diamonds. Didn't you know?"

"I think that process takes a really long time."

"Time is all I have…and coal."

We stood off to the edge as the beast rolled by.  
I think we both thought about what would happen
if we stepped in front of the next one.
Both in different ways.

"You should leave. I feel silly being watched."

"Diamonds right?  Aren't they all about pressure?

"And heat."  She smiled and removed her sunglasses.  

Suddenly the stars were out.
I wrote this after seeing this picture. [link] It was just a very inspiring and peace invoking picture in my opinion and I don't think I did the picture justice by I tried. He has many cool pictures in his gallery so check him out!
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:iconandrewpom:
Just like in the image from which you drew your inspiration, the mysterious chick you describe is both cool and enticing.

"A right handed whiskey bottle slung over her razor wire shoulder", you say, before describing her drunken ramblings and dreams of the limelight -- but today, like in the image of the sun setting over a suburban train track, her dreams don't set until the sun does.

Don't try and tell her of logic and reason! That process make take a long time, but time is all she has.
Freedom -- put into a single sentence. Fantastic.

I wonder what she was thinking when the train thundered by? Perhaps of how it all doesn't matter; but of how she saw hope in an untimely death.
And you? Probably something logical, or something likewise that is nonsensical.

Don't cramp her style with your reason and doubt; just use it to intensify her coolness when you write a poem about her. Because that's what you do perfectly. You create a character -- one that is mysterious and cool and completely awesome -- with a few, simple lines.

You saw the image, you saw what it was about the girl that made her stylish, and you manifested it perfectly into words; and I am in awe of how smoothly and efficiently you did so. Simply brilliant.
What do you think?
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:iconmarionette-dancer:
Marionette-Dancer Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I'm not sure I fully understand it but I love it anyways. Made me think : )
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:iconhalcyonshores:
halcyonshores Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Excellent write. :rose:
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:iconladyofgaerdon:
LadyofGaerdon Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2012  Professional Writer
:wave: Hello! Your piece has been included in the :iconlit-visual-alliance: feature. Thank you for contributing your artwork and supporting the alliance! :salute:
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:iconrussiantim:
RussianTim Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Professional Writer
Thank you :)
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:iconemmasloane:
EmmaSloane Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2012   Writer
Amazing.
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:iconfaehorsley:
FaeHorsley Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
very beautiful imagary i really enjoyed reading it :D
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:iconlancelotprice:
LancelotPrice Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2012
This one makes me want to write something. :) Well done.
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:iconjudah-leonardo:
Judah-Leonardo Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2012   Writer
Here's one where I saw the pileup of stuff in my messages and thought I'd leave it for later. But then I looked at the thumbnail, and I got sucked in, just like that. Fantastic!
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:iconbreezybrutality:
breezybrutality Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Ugh it would be you that wrote this masterpiece haha Just Kidding!
This makes me want to meet the girl :) she seems a little wild and like I would totally feel inadequate if I were standing next to her.
"Today, the train track was a catwalk ." <3
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:icondietcocaine:
dietcocaine Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2012   Writer
I think you definitely did it.
I liked this a lot.
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